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Friday, April 1, 2011


My sources tell me that the President will make a surprise address to the nation this evening. He is going to announce that all troops were pulled out of Afghanistan and Iraq, and order the immediate cessation of drone and missile strikes in Pakistan, as well as an end to American participation in the war in Libya.

According to a highly placed anonymous White House official, the President feels that it is time to live up to his Nobel Peace Prize.

However, progressives who oppose the war may be disappointed to learn that the withdrawal is scheduled to last only one day -- April 1.

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